小時侯不喜歡兩個妹妹-雖然細細妹小時侯可愛得不得了,我常常咬她下巴-，覺得有負擔。
中學時媽媽重病，我躲在一角哭，未來茫茫不可知，我怕我要養妹妹。多年後跟麗口說起此事，她說她也有哭，她怕她要養我這姐姐和妹妹。
可能細細妹也有哭，怕自己要養兩個姐姐。
現在覺得有妹妹很好，麗口再怎樣不同意我的處事為人也不會出賣我，最多說：「你裸睡我唔同你訓。」古箏壓著我的手指時妹妹會幫我扛起古箏，我想看nana妹妹會借我看，我失眠妹妹給我聽 at17。
當麗口叫我不要天真時，我便想起麗口亦一定有受傷的時刻，便深感哀矜。
星期一, 11月 29, 2010
Meeting Ms Violet Lim of Lunch actually
If you have a problem, what will you do? Crying in the dark? Denial?
If I have a problem, I seek assistance from experts. The real experts.
As a chain of consequences I met Violet. Co-founding Lunch Actually the dating agency with her husband, Violet actualised her career aspiration and lived a happy live with happy money.
I enjoyed the one and a half hours of chatty time with Violet very much. She's kind, honest and intelligent. The conversation was free flow, natural and contented. I feel like I was talking with a clinic psychologist!
Thanks Violet for your time and feedback. My choice of bedtime reading for the coming week will be nothing but your book.
If I have a problem, I seek assistance from experts. The real experts.
As a chain of consequences I met Violet. Co-founding Lunch Actually the dating agency with her husband, Violet actualised her career aspiration and lived a happy live with happy money.
I enjoyed the one and a half hours of chatty time with Violet very much. She's kind, honest and intelligent. The conversation was free flow, natural and contented. I feel like I was talking with a clinic psychologist!
Thanks Violet for your time and feedback. My choice of bedtime reading for the coming week will be nothing but your book.
星期六, 11月 27, 2010
Churchill said: "Never, never, never, never give up."
It's time for me to grow up.
++++
Robert Greene - The 48 Laws of Power
Law 1 Never Outshine the Master
Always make those above you feel comfortably superior. In your desire to please or impress them, do not go too far in displaying your talents or you might accomplish the opposite � inspire fear and insecurity. Make your masters appear more brilliant than they are and you will attain the heights of power.
Law 2 Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies
Be wary of friends-they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact, you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them.
Law 3 Conceal your Intentions
Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. If they have no clue what you are up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelope them in enough smoke, and by the time they realize your intentions, it will be too late.
Law 4 Always Say Less than Necessary
When you are trying to impress people with words, the more you say, the more common you appear, and the less in control. Even if you are saying something banal, it will seem original if you make it vague, open-ended, and sphinxlike. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.
Law 5 So Much Depends on Reputation � Guard it with your Life
Reputation is the cornerstone of power. Through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once you slip, however, you are vulnerable, and will be attacked on all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile, learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. Then stand aside and let public opinion hang them.
Law 6 Court Attention at all Cost
Everything is judged by its appearance; what is unseen counts for nothing. Never let yourself get lost in the crowd, then, or buried in oblivion. Stand out. Be conspicuous, at all cost. Make yourself a magnet of attention by appearing larger, more colorful, more mysterious, than the bland and timid masses.
Law 7 Get others to do the Work for you, but Always Take the Credit
Use the wisdom, knowledge, and legwork of other people to further your own cause. Not only will such assistance save you valuable time and energy, it will give you a godlike aura of efficiency and speed. In the end your helpers will be forgotten and you will be remembered. Never do yourself what others can do for you.
Law 8 Make other People come to you � use Bait if Necessary
When you force the other person to act, you are the one in control. It is always better to make your opponent come to you, abandoning his own plans in the process. Lure him with fabulous gains � then attack. You hold the cards.
Law 9 Win through your Actions, Never through Argument
Any momentary triumph you think gained through argument is really a Pyrrhic victory: The resentment and ill will you stir up is stronger and lasts longer than any momentary change of opinion. It is much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions, without saying a word. Demonstrate, do not explicate.
Law 10 Infection: Avoid the Unhappy and Unlucky
You can die from someone else�s misery � emotional states are as infectious as disease. You may feel you are helping the drowning man but you are only precipitating your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves; they will also draw it on you. Associate with the happy and fortunate instead.
Law 11 Learn to Keep People Dependent on You
To maintain your independence you must always be needed and wanted. The more you are relied on, the more freedom you have. Make people depend on you for their happiness and prosperity and you have nothing to fear. Never teach them enough so that they can do without you.
Law 12 Use Selective Honesty and Generosity to Disarm your Victim
One sincere and honest move will cover over dozens of dishonest ones. Open-hearted gestures of honesty and generosity bring down the guard of even the most suspicious people. Once your selective honesty opens a hole in their armor, you can deceive and manipulate them at will. A timely gift � a Trojan horse � will serve the same purpose.
Law 13 When Asking for Help, Appeal to People�s Self-Interest, Never to their Mercy or Gratitude
If you need to turn to an ally for help, do not bother to remind him of your past assistance and good deeds. He will find a way to ignore you. Instead, uncover something in your request, or in your alliance with him, that will benefit him, and emphasize it out of all proportion. He will respond enthusiastically when he sees something to be gained for himself.
Law 14 Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy
Knowing about your rival is critical. Use spies to gather valuable information that will keep you a step ahead. Better still: Play the spy yourself. In polite social encounters, learn to probe. Ask indirect questions to get people to reveal their weaknesses and intentions. There is no occasion that is not an opportunity for artful spying.
Law 15 Crush your Enemy Totally
All great leaders since Moses have known that a feared enemy must be crushed completely. (Sometimes they have learned this the hard way.) If one ember is left alight, no matter how dimly it smolders, a fire will eventually break out. More is lost through stopping halfway than through total annihilation: The enemy will recover, and will seek revenge. Crush him, not only in body but in spirit.
Law 16 Use Absence to Increase Respect and Honor
Too much circulation makes the price go down: The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group, temporary withdrawal from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.
Law 17 Keep Others in Suspended Terror: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability
Humans are creatures of habit with an insatiable need to see familiarity in other people�s actions. Your predictability gives them a sense of control. Turn the tables: Be deliberately unpredictable. Behavior that seems to have no consistency or purpose will keep them off-balance, and they will wear themselves out trying to explain your moves. Taken to an extreme, this strategy can intimidate and terrorize.
Law 18 Do Not Build Fortresses to Protect Yourself � Isolation is Dangerous
The world is dangerous and enemies are everywhere � everyone has to protect themselves. A fortress seems the safest. But isolation exposes you to more dangers than it protects you from � it cuts you off from valuable information, it makes you conspicuous and an easy target. Better to circulate among people find allies, mingle. You are shielded from your enemies by the crowd.
Law 19 Know Who You�re Dealing with � Do Not Offend the Wrong Person
There are many different kinds of people in the world, and you can never assume that everyone will react to your strategies in the same way. Deceive or outmaneuver some people and they will spend the rest of their lives seeking revenge. They are wolves in lambs� clothing. Choose your victims and opponents carefully, then � never offend or deceive the wrong person.
Law 20 Do Not Commit to Anyone
It is the fool who always rushes to take sides. Do not commit to any side or cause but yourself. By maintaining your independence, you become the master of others � playing people against one another, making them pursue you.
Law 21 Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker � Seem Dumber than your Mark
No one likes feeling stupider than the next persons. The trick, is to make your victims feel smart � and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives.
Law 22 Use the Surrender Tactic: Transform Weakness into Power
When you are weaker, never fight for honor�s sake; choose surrender instead. Surrender gives you time to recover, time to torment and irritate your conqueror, time to wait for his power to wane. Do not give him the satisfaction of fighting and defeating you � surrender first. By turning the other check you infuriate and unsettle him. Make surrender a tool of power.
Law 23 Concentrate Your Forces
Conserve your forces and energies by keeping them concentrated at their strongest point. You gain more by finding a rich mine and mining it deeper, than by flitting from one shallow mine to another � intensity defeats extensity every time. When looking for sources of power to elevate you, find the one key patron, the fat cow who will give you milk for a long time to come.
Law 24 Play the Perfect Courtier
The perfect courtier thrives in a world where everything revolves around power and political dexterity. He has mastered the art of indirection; he flatters, yields to superiors, and asserts power over others in the mot oblique and graceful manner. Learn and apply the laws of courtiership and there will be no limit to how far you can rise in the court.
Law 25 Re-Create Yourself
Do not accept the roles that society foists on you. Re-create yourself by forging a new identity, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. Be the master of your own image rather than letting others define if for you. Incorporate dramatic devices into your public gestures and actions � your power will be enhanced and your character will seem larger than life.
Law 26 Keep Your Hands Clean
You must seem a paragon of civility and efficiency: Your hands are never soiled by mistakes and nasty deeds. Maintain such a spotless appearance by using others as scapegoats and cat�s-paws to disguise your involvement.
Law 27 Play on People�s Need to Believe to Create a Cultlike Following
People have an overwhelming desire to believe in something. Become the focal point of such desire by offering them a cause, a new faith to follow. Keep your words vague but full of promise; emphasize enthusiasm over rationality and clear thinking. Give your new disciples rituals to perform, ask them to make sacrifices on your behalf. In the absence of organized religion and grand causes, your new belief system will bring you untold power.
Law 28 Enter Action with Boldness
If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: Better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honors the timid.
Law 29 Plan All the Way to the End
The ending is everything. Plan all the way to it, taking into account all the possible consequences, obstacles, and twists of fortune that might reverse your hard work and give the glory to others. By planning to the end you will not be overwhelmed by circumstances and you will know when to stop. Gently guide fortune and help determine the future by thinking far ahead.
Law 30 Make your Accomplishments Seem Effortless
Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease. All the toil and practice that go into them, and also all the clever tricks, must be concealed. When you act, act effortlessly, as if you could do much more. Avoid the temptation of revealing how hard you work � it only raises questions. Teach no one your tricks or they will be used against you.
Law 31 Control the Options: Get Others to Play with the Cards you Deal
The best deceptions are the ones that seem to give the other person a choice: Your victims feel they are in control, but are actually your puppets. Give people options that come out in your favor whichever one they choose. Force them to make choices between the lesser of two evils, both of which serve your purpose. Put them on the horns of a dilemma: They are gored wherever they turn.
Law 32 Play to People�s Fantasies
The truth is often avoided because it is ugly and unpleasant. Never appeal to truth and reality unless you are prepared for the anger that comes for disenchantment. Life is so harsh and distressing that people who can manufacture romance or conjure up fantasy are like oases in the desert: Everyone flocks to them. There is great power in tapping into the fantasies of the masses.
Law 33 Discover Each Man�s Thumbscrew
Everyone has a weakness, a gap in the castle wall. That weakness is usual y an insecurity, an uncontrollable emotion or need; it can also be a small secret pleasure. Either way, once found, it is a thumbscrew you can turn to your advantage.
Law 34 Be Royal in your Own Fashion: Act like a King to be treated like one
The way you carry yourself will often determine how you are treated; In the long run, appearing vulgar or common will make people disrespect you. For a king respects himself and inspires the same sentiment in others. By acting regally and confident of your powers, you make yourself seem destined to wear a crown.
Law 35 Master the Art of Timing
Never seem to be in a hurry � hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself, and over time. Always seem patient, as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. Become a detective of the right moment; sniff out the spirit of the times, the trends that will carry you to power. Learn to stand back when the time is not yet ripe, and to strike fiercely when it has reached fruition.
Law 36 Disdain Things you cannot have: Ignoring them is the best Revenge
By acknowledging a petty problem you give it existence and credibility. The more attention you pay an enemy, the stronger you make him; and a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. It is sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but cannot have, show contempt for it. The less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem.
Law 37 Create Compelling Spectacles
Striking imagery and grand symbolic gestures create the aura of power � everyone responds to them. Stage spectacles for those around you, then full of arresting visuals and radiant symbols that heighten your presence. Dazzled by appearances, no one will notice what you are really doing.
Law 38 Think as you like but Behave like others
If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that you only want attention and that you look down upon them. They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior. It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who are sure to appreciate your uniqueness.
Law 39 Stir up Waters to Catch Fish
Anger and emotion are strategically counterproductive. You must always stay calm and objective. But if you can make your enemies angry while staying calm yourself, you gain a decided advantage. Put your enemies off-balance: Find the chink in their vanity through which you can rattle them and you hold the strings.
Law 40 Despise the Free Lunch
What is offered for free is dangerous � it usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. What has worth is worth paying for. By paying your own way you stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. It is also often wise to pay the full price � there is no cutting corners with excellence. Be lavish with your money and keep it circulating, for generosity is a sign and a magnet for power.
Law 41 Avoid Stepping into a Great Man�s Shoes
What happens first always appears better and more original than what comes after. If you succeed a great man or have a famous parent, you will have to accomplish double their achievements to outshine them. Do not get lost in their shadow, or stuck in a past not of your own making: Establish your own name and identity by changing course. Slay the overbearing father, disparage his legacy, and gain power by shining in your own way.
Law 42 Strike the Shepherd and the Sheep will Scatter
Trouble can often be traced to a single strong individual � the stirrer, the arrogant underling, the poisoned of goodwill. If you allow such people room to operate, others will succumb to their influence. Do not wait for the troubles they cause to multiply, do not try to negotiate with them � they are irredeemable. Neutralize their influence by isolating or banishing them. Strike at the source of the trouble and the sheep will scatter.
Law 43 Work on the Hearts and Minds of Others
Coercion creates a reaction that will eventually work against you. You must seduce others into wanting to move in your direction. A person you have seduced becomes your loyal pawn. And the way to seduce others is to operate on their individual psychologies and weaknesses. Soften up the resistant by working on their emotions, playing on what they hold dear and what they fear. Ignore the hearts and minds of others and they will grow to hate you.
Law 44 Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect
The mirror reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: When you mirror your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The Mirror Effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding up a mirror to their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding up a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of Mirror Effect.
Law 45 Preach the Need for Change, but Never Reform too much at Once
Everyone understands the need for change in the abstract, but on the day-to-day level people are creatures of habit. Too much innovation is traumatic, and will lead to revolt. If you are new to a position of power, or an outsider trying to build a power base, make a show of respecting the old way of doing things. If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement on the past.
Law 46 Never appear too Perfect
Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weaknesses. Envy creates silent enemies. It is smart to occasionally display defects, and admit to harmless vices, in order to deflect envy and appear more human and approachable. Only gods and the dead can seem perfect with impunity.
Law 47 Do not go Past the Mark you Aimed for; In Victory, Learn when to Stop
The moment of victory is often the moment of greatest peril. In the heat of victory, arrogance and overconfidence can push you past the goal you had aimed for, and by going too far, you make more enemies than you defeat. Do not allow success to go to your head. There is no substitute for strategy and careful planning. Set a goal, and when you reach it, stop.
Law 48 Assume Formlessness
By taking a shape, by having a visible plan, you open yourself to attack. Instead of taking a form for your enemy to grasp, keep yourself adaptable and on the move. Accept the fact that nothing is certain and no law is fixed. The best way to protect yourself is to be as fluid and formless as water; never bet on stability or lasting order. Everything changes.
RobertGreene.net 2009-2010. Wikipedia | Free PUA Videos | LAX Flights
++++
Robert Greene - The 48 Laws of Power
Law 1 Never Outshine the Master
Always make those above you feel comfortably superior. In your desire to please or impress them, do not go too far in displaying your talents or you might accomplish the opposite � inspire fear and insecurity. Make your masters appear more brilliant than they are and you will attain the heights of power.
Law 2 Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies
Be wary of friends-they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact, you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them.
Law 3 Conceal your Intentions
Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. If they have no clue what you are up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelope them in enough smoke, and by the time they realize your intentions, it will be too late.
Law 4 Always Say Less than Necessary
When you are trying to impress people with words, the more you say, the more common you appear, and the less in control. Even if you are saying something banal, it will seem original if you make it vague, open-ended, and sphinxlike. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.
Law 5 So Much Depends on Reputation � Guard it with your Life
Reputation is the cornerstone of power. Through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once you slip, however, you are vulnerable, and will be attacked on all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile, learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. Then stand aside and let public opinion hang them.
Law 6 Court Attention at all Cost
Everything is judged by its appearance; what is unseen counts for nothing. Never let yourself get lost in the crowd, then, or buried in oblivion. Stand out. Be conspicuous, at all cost. Make yourself a magnet of attention by appearing larger, more colorful, more mysterious, than the bland and timid masses.
Law 7 Get others to do the Work for you, but Always Take the Credit
Use the wisdom, knowledge, and legwork of other people to further your own cause. Not only will such assistance save you valuable time and energy, it will give you a godlike aura of efficiency and speed. In the end your helpers will be forgotten and you will be remembered. Never do yourself what others can do for you.
Law 8 Make other People come to you � use Bait if Necessary
When you force the other person to act, you are the one in control. It is always better to make your opponent come to you, abandoning his own plans in the process. Lure him with fabulous gains � then attack. You hold the cards.
Law 9 Win through your Actions, Never through Argument
Any momentary triumph you think gained through argument is really a Pyrrhic victory: The resentment and ill will you stir up is stronger and lasts longer than any momentary change of opinion. It is much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions, without saying a word. Demonstrate, do not explicate.
Law 10 Infection: Avoid the Unhappy and Unlucky
You can die from someone else�s misery � emotional states are as infectious as disease. You may feel you are helping the drowning man but you are only precipitating your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves; they will also draw it on you. Associate with the happy and fortunate instead.
Law 11 Learn to Keep People Dependent on You
To maintain your independence you must always be needed and wanted. The more you are relied on, the more freedom you have. Make people depend on you for their happiness and prosperity and you have nothing to fear. Never teach them enough so that they can do without you.
Law 12 Use Selective Honesty and Generosity to Disarm your Victim
One sincere and honest move will cover over dozens of dishonest ones. Open-hearted gestures of honesty and generosity bring down the guard of even the most suspicious people. Once your selective honesty opens a hole in their armor, you can deceive and manipulate them at will. A timely gift � a Trojan horse � will serve the same purpose.
Law 13 When Asking for Help, Appeal to People�s Self-Interest, Never to their Mercy or Gratitude
If you need to turn to an ally for help, do not bother to remind him of your past assistance and good deeds. He will find a way to ignore you. Instead, uncover something in your request, or in your alliance with him, that will benefit him, and emphasize it out of all proportion. He will respond enthusiastically when he sees something to be gained for himself.
Law 14 Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy
Knowing about your rival is critical. Use spies to gather valuable information that will keep you a step ahead. Better still: Play the spy yourself. In polite social encounters, learn to probe. Ask indirect questions to get people to reveal their weaknesses and intentions. There is no occasion that is not an opportunity for artful spying.
Law 15 Crush your Enemy Totally
All great leaders since Moses have known that a feared enemy must be crushed completely. (Sometimes they have learned this the hard way.) If one ember is left alight, no matter how dimly it smolders, a fire will eventually break out. More is lost through stopping halfway than through total annihilation: The enemy will recover, and will seek revenge. Crush him, not only in body but in spirit.
Law 16 Use Absence to Increase Respect and Honor
Too much circulation makes the price go down: The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group, temporary withdrawal from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.
Law 17 Keep Others in Suspended Terror: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability
Humans are creatures of habit with an insatiable need to see familiarity in other people�s actions. Your predictability gives them a sense of control. Turn the tables: Be deliberately unpredictable. Behavior that seems to have no consistency or purpose will keep them off-balance, and they will wear themselves out trying to explain your moves. Taken to an extreme, this strategy can intimidate and terrorize.
Law 18 Do Not Build Fortresses to Protect Yourself � Isolation is Dangerous
The world is dangerous and enemies are everywhere � everyone has to protect themselves. A fortress seems the safest. But isolation exposes you to more dangers than it protects you from � it cuts you off from valuable information, it makes you conspicuous and an easy target. Better to circulate among people find allies, mingle. You are shielded from your enemies by the crowd.
Law 19 Know Who You�re Dealing with � Do Not Offend the Wrong Person
There are many different kinds of people in the world, and you can never assume that everyone will react to your strategies in the same way. Deceive or outmaneuver some people and they will spend the rest of their lives seeking revenge. They are wolves in lambs� clothing. Choose your victims and opponents carefully, then � never offend or deceive the wrong person.
Law 20 Do Not Commit to Anyone
It is the fool who always rushes to take sides. Do not commit to any side or cause but yourself. By maintaining your independence, you become the master of others � playing people against one another, making them pursue you.
Law 21 Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker � Seem Dumber than your Mark
No one likes feeling stupider than the next persons. The trick, is to make your victims feel smart � and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives.
Law 22 Use the Surrender Tactic: Transform Weakness into Power
When you are weaker, never fight for honor�s sake; choose surrender instead. Surrender gives you time to recover, time to torment and irritate your conqueror, time to wait for his power to wane. Do not give him the satisfaction of fighting and defeating you � surrender first. By turning the other check you infuriate and unsettle him. Make surrender a tool of power.
Law 23 Concentrate Your Forces
Conserve your forces and energies by keeping them concentrated at their strongest point. You gain more by finding a rich mine and mining it deeper, than by flitting from one shallow mine to another � intensity defeats extensity every time. When looking for sources of power to elevate you, find the one key patron, the fat cow who will give you milk for a long time to come.
Law 24 Play the Perfect Courtier
The perfect courtier thrives in a world where everything revolves around power and political dexterity. He has mastered the art of indirection; he flatters, yields to superiors, and asserts power over others in the mot oblique and graceful manner. Learn and apply the laws of courtiership and there will be no limit to how far you can rise in the court.
Law 25 Re-Create Yourself
Do not accept the roles that society foists on you. Re-create yourself by forging a new identity, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. Be the master of your own image rather than letting others define if for you. Incorporate dramatic devices into your public gestures and actions � your power will be enhanced and your character will seem larger than life.
Law 26 Keep Your Hands Clean
You must seem a paragon of civility and efficiency: Your hands are never soiled by mistakes and nasty deeds. Maintain such a spotless appearance by using others as scapegoats and cat�s-paws to disguise your involvement.
Law 27 Play on People�s Need to Believe to Create a Cultlike Following
People have an overwhelming desire to believe in something. Become the focal point of such desire by offering them a cause, a new faith to follow. Keep your words vague but full of promise; emphasize enthusiasm over rationality and clear thinking. Give your new disciples rituals to perform, ask them to make sacrifices on your behalf. In the absence of organized religion and grand causes, your new belief system will bring you untold power.
Law 28 Enter Action with Boldness
If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: Better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honors the timid.
Law 29 Plan All the Way to the End
The ending is everything. Plan all the way to it, taking into account all the possible consequences, obstacles, and twists of fortune that might reverse your hard work and give the glory to others. By planning to the end you will not be overwhelmed by circumstances and you will know when to stop. Gently guide fortune and help determine the future by thinking far ahead.
Law 30 Make your Accomplishments Seem Effortless
Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease. All the toil and practice that go into them, and also all the clever tricks, must be concealed. When you act, act effortlessly, as if you could do much more. Avoid the temptation of revealing how hard you work � it only raises questions. Teach no one your tricks or they will be used against you.
Law 31 Control the Options: Get Others to Play with the Cards you Deal
The best deceptions are the ones that seem to give the other person a choice: Your victims feel they are in control, but are actually your puppets. Give people options that come out in your favor whichever one they choose. Force them to make choices between the lesser of two evils, both of which serve your purpose. Put them on the horns of a dilemma: They are gored wherever they turn.
Law 32 Play to People�s Fantasies
The truth is often avoided because it is ugly and unpleasant. Never appeal to truth and reality unless you are prepared for the anger that comes for disenchantment. Life is so harsh and distressing that people who can manufacture romance or conjure up fantasy are like oases in the desert: Everyone flocks to them. There is great power in tapping into the fantasies of the masses.
Law 33 Discover Each Man�s Thumbscrew
Everyone has a weakness, a gap in the castle wall. That weakness is usual y an insecurity, an uncontrollable emotion or need; it can also be a small secret pleasure. Either way, once found, it is a thumbscrew you can turn to your advantage.
Law 34 Be Royal in your Own Fashion: Act like a King to be treated like one
The way you carry yourself will often determine how you are treated; In the long run, appearing vulgar or common will make people disrespect you. For a king respects himself and inspires the same sentiment in others. By acting regally and confident of your powers, you make yourself seem destined to wear a crown.
Law 35 Master the Art of Timing
Never seem to be in a hurry � hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself, and over time. Always seem patient, as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. Become a detective of the right moment; sniff out the spirit of the times, the trends that will carry you to power. Learn to stand back when the time is not yet ripe, and to strike fiercely when it has reached fruition.
Law 36 Disdain Things you cannot have: Ignoring them is the best Revenge
By acknowledging a petty problem you give it existence and credibility. The more attention you pay an enemy, the stronger you make him; and a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. It is sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but cannot have, show contempt for it. The less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem.
Law 37 Create Compelling Spectacles
Striking imagery and grand symbolic gestures create the aura of power � everyone responds to them. Stage spectacles for those around you, then full of arresting visuals and radiant symbols that heighten your presence. Dazzled by appearances, no one will notice what you are really doing.
Law 38 Think as you like but Behave like others
If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that you only want attention and that you look down upon them. They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior. It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who are sure to appreciate your uniqueness.
Law 39 Stir up Waters to Catch Fish
Anger and emotion are strategically counterproductive. You must always stay calm and objective. But if you can make your enemies angry while staying calm yourself, you gain a decided advantage. Put your enemies off-balance: Find the chink in their vanity through which you can rattle them and you hold the strings.
Law 40 Despise the Free Lunch
What is offered for free is dangerous � it usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. What has worth is worth paying for. By paying your own way you stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. It is also often wise to pay the full price � there is no cutting corners with excellence. Be lavish with your money and keep it circulating, for generosity is a sign and a magnet for power.
Law 41 Avoid Stepping into a Great Man�s Shoes
What happens first always appears better and more original than what comes after. If you succeed a great man or have a famous parent, you will have to accomplish double their achievements to outshine them. Do not get lost in their shadow, or stuck in a past not of your own making: Establish your own name and identity by changing course. Slay the overbearing father, disparage his legacy, and gain power by shining in your own way.
Law 42 Strike the Shepherd and the Sheep will Scatter
Trouble can often be traced to a single strong individual � the stirrer, the arrogant underling, the poisoned of goodwill. If you allow such people room to operate, others will succumb to their influence. Do not wait for the troubles they cause to multiply, do not try to negotiate with them � they are irredeemable. Neutralize their influence by isolating or banishing them. Strike at the source of the trouble and the sheep will scatter.
Law 43 Work on the Hearts and Minds of Others
Coercion creates a reaction that will eventually work against you. You must seduce others into wanting to move in your direction. A person you have seduced becomes your loyal pawn. And the way to seduce others is to operate on their individual psychologies and weaknesses. Soften up the resistant by working on their emotions, playing on what they hold dear and what they fear. Ignore the hearts and minds of others and they will grow to hate you.
Law 44 Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect
The mirror reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: When you mirror your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The Mirror Effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding up a mirror to their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding up a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of Mirror Effect.
Law 45 Preach the Need for Change, but Never Reform too much at Once
Everyone understands the need for change in the abstract, but on the day-to-day level people are creatures of habit. Too much innovation is traumatic, and will lead to revolt. If you are new to a position of power, or an outsider trying to build a power base, make a show of respecting the old way of doing things. If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement on the past.
Law 46 Never appear too Perfect
Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weaknesses. Envy creates silent enemies. It is smart to occasionally display defects, and admit to harmless vices, in order to deflect envy and appear more human and approachable. Only gods and the dead can seem perfect with impunity.
Law 47 Do not go Past the Mark you Aimed for; In Victory, Learn when to Stop
The moment of victory is often the moment of greatest peril. In the heat of victory, arrogance and overconfidence can push you past the goal you had aimed for, and by going too far, you make more enemies than you defeat. Do not allow success to go to your head. There is no substitute for strategy and careful planning. Set a goal, and when you reach it, stop.
Law 48 Assume Formlessness
By taking a shape, by having a visible plan, you open yourself to attack. Instead of taking a form for your enemy to grasp, keep yourself adaptable and on the move. Accept the fact that nothing is certain and no law is fixed. The best way to protect yourself is to be as fluid and formless as water; never bet on stability or lasting order. Everything changes.
RobertGreene.net 2009-2010. Wikipedia | Free PUA Videos | LAX Flights
星期四, 11月 25, 2010
星期三, 11月 24, 2010
星期二, 11月 23, 2010
樓
樓宇買賣明明是一項微觀經濟行為，要樓價跌，要不增加供應，要不迄制需求。
但我們的政府來了一招宏觀調控。當然你可以說那是用宏觀手段來減少微觀需求。不過不是很奇怪嗎？我覺得政府不敢向地產商直接開刀（你唔係覺得限制發水樓係招下嘛），卻拿了用家和投資者來祭旗。懲罰性印花稅是增加交易風險（你不知道你會不會失業生病而要賣樓...失業生病要賣樓套現已經很慘，仲可能要比人罰），從而減少需求。
樓價是會跌的，但租金卻未必，因為我不認為市場存在很多因為業主要炒樓而丟空的吉屋--至少在我這一區。如果這區租金大跌，那麼香港很不妙。這區的租客很多是expat，expat 不來香港，哇。
又，下調銀行可承做按揭成數，即是說銀行少借了錢出街，亦是說貨幣供應萎縮？errrrrr
但銀行還銀行，財務公司是可以借多一些的--只要你願意多付點利息。去年的實戰經驗是，安信兄弟可做九成按揭，其中七成用 P+3(大概），餘下兩成利率更高。
話說回來，我真的不明白好端端為什麼要增加交易風險。為什麼不是干干淨淨的加印花稅並同時寬免首置印花稅呢？
但我們的政府來了一招宏觀調控。當然你可以說那是用宏觀手段來減少微觀需求。不過不是很奇怪嗎？我覺得政府不敢向地產商直接開刀（你唔係覺得限制發水樓係招下嘛），卻拿了用家和投資者來祭旗。懲罰性印花稅是增加交易風險（你不知道你會不會失業生病而要賣樓...失業生病要賣樓套現已經很慘，仲可能要比人罰），從而減少需求。
樓價是會跌的，但租金卻未必，因為我不認為市場存在很多因為業主要炒樓而丟空的吉屋--至少在我這一區。如果這區租金大跌，那麼香港很不妙。這區的租客很多是expat，expat 不來香港，哇。
又，下調銀行可承做按揭成數，即是說銀行少借了錢出街，亦是說貨幣供應萎縮？errrrrr
但銀行還銀行，財務公司是可以借多一些的--只要你願意多付點利息。去年的實戰經驗是，安信兄弟可做九成按揭，其中七成用 P+3(大概），餘下兩成利率更高。
話說回來，我真的不明白好端端為什麼要增加交易風險。為什麼不是干干淨淨的加印花稅並同時寬免首置印花稅呢？
星期一, 11月 22, 2010
Luncheon seating arrangement
我做過最複雜的 seating arrangement 是有三檯共三十人，飯局只有兩小時，八個菜，主人想坐勻每一檯。
結果是音樂椅+co-host+一個管家兩位侍應。飯前要綵排。well。
Swop 是很麻煩的一件事，社交秘書必需想得非常貼心，並且跟侍應做好溝通。做 swop 但
星期日, 11月 21, 2010
星期六, 11月 20, 2010
方敏生
GG常常血洗部落，見到好野就拿拿臨轉貼先：
2010年11月20日星期六
http://go47.blogspot.com/2010/11/blog-post_20.html
方敏生
最尾兩段。
得閒，我會講「正義．幸福．起跑線」。
************
信報財經新聞 2010-11-20 P13 | 政在生活 | 政在生活 | By 何素文
走入凡間 方敏生
外表纖纖弱質的社聯行政總裁方敏生，想必有點反叛的基因。當年中學時代，讀的是「師姑庵」的修女學校，卻自我作主選擇了在中六的時候轉往英皇書院，變成男校女生！大學時期，沒有往外國升學去，而是選擇在香港讀書，還堅持要入住以「玩」聞名的聖約翰宿舍。家境富裕，卻選擇到俗稱雞寮的寮屋區去當個發動居民動起來的社工。這一切一切，方敏生不說，真是看不出來！
方敏生剛剛獲政府委任成為二十位關愛基金成員之一。社會近日掀起了一股「仇富潮」，隨即鼓動對弱勢要有「關愛精神」。
「關愛」的意思比以前複雜、混雜了，有人出發點較單純，發生在非洲安哥拉正在去除地雷的小徑，走在上面的是英國戴安娜王妃，冒險是喚起世界關注掃雷。
遠一點的例子，就有一代偶像柯德莉夏萍，離開聲色犬馬的荷里活後，逕自跑到第三世界國家，呼籲發達國家關愛貧童。
放下身段對不少人來說是艱難，但對於一些人卻很容易！
方敏生便是一個例子。她家世顯赫，祖父是「抗日名將」方振武，父親方心讓除了是骨科名醫外，也是立法局及行政局的非官守議員。至於前政務司司長陳方安生，就是方敏生的堂姐。像所有名門大家庭之後一樣，方敏生自少都獲得很好的生活與教育安排，小時候一直讀「修女學校」，是那種同學們都有工人送午飯到學校來的那種「富貴人家」的學校，當年，她還會做一點浪漫的事來，就是不坐私家車偏要坐坐巴士，來體驗生活。「我們突登試下搭、了解什麼是隧道巴士！」。她的生活，一如其大學教授所言是「很好彩」，而她也承認自己一直以來的生活就像活在「龜殼」，處處受到保護。
不過，她可不甘於活在舒適的「龜殼」內。「龜殼」可以是保護，也可以視為一個窒礙， 「如果不伸出手腳出殼外，如何走前一步？走的一步可能好刺腳，但走前一步，可以找自己的海洋、自己的天空！」於是，中六那一年，方敏生為自己人生作出了一個重要抉擇，由「修女學校」轉到「平民學校」英皇書院，近距離體驗社會。到升讀大學，她也選擇入香港大學修讀社工，拒絕美國或英國大學的取錄，留在香港，希望多點了解社會。實習都是到漁灣居民組織、婦女戒毒工作、在觀塘雞寮的職業學校當駐校社工。而畢業後的第一份工作也是在李鄭屋的基層組織「基愛」，幫助寮屋居民。
一步又一步的打開人生一扇又一扇窗，讓她領悟到「在我的生活圈子是很理所當然的事，原來在同一社會入面，很多人不是！」她看到了較貧困的同學，寧願留在學校、有冷氣的機場讀書。她也看到了一些人的生命是沒有「希望」這兩個字！
「看到自己的細佬妹考慮的只是到英國或美國讀書，但雞寮的細路是沒有機會的，當時放學的那些細路，還被駐校社工『的』回學校，因為門口有黑社會在等梗放學！」她當時很動氣，還問那些學生： 「好的就俾人拉入冊，不好的就被人斬開一碌碌，你第日想點！」「你會看到什麼地方出身，就是什麼機會！沒有人可以選擇自己在哪裏開始，正如我沒有得選擇在哪個環境出身，他們也是沒有！」方敏生皺起眉頭，哀慟地說。
從低層中她明白到，世界其實很大！
跟方敏生談談，明白到她最大的本錢，並非家底、學識，而是她父母，尤其是爸爸的身教及對她的包容。
方心讓既是名醫，更是復康會創立人，他把復康工作看得重過事業，而小時候的方敏生自小跟父親出席活動、接觸殘障人士，令她有點領略， 「他教我活著不是為自己！」大學畢業後，大抵是反叛性格，當時方敏生有「三不」， 「政府不做！大機構不做！復康也不做，因為爸爸做復康！」最後落戶了在李鄭屋的基層組織「基愛」，主要服務白田安置區，劃下了社工生涯的起步點。比起上述的三個選擇，安置區單是看衛生環境，聽上來也最難忍受的。「公用的廁所如果是旱廁，就更加核突啦，我們返工去廁所，廁所門又爛晒，有些是條坑的，不是一個一個的廁所。」環境差，人背景複雜。那裏有邊緣社群、「癮君子」躲起來吸毒、罪案又特別多，偷竊、婦女洗澡遭人偷窺等事都會發生。那時做居民組織的方敏生還要等到晚上、街坊下班才上班，她習以為常。
「那時很多門字入面有字的那些字，全部識晒！」她哈哈說！
不過，她感激父親從來都是對她信任，更沒有多過問。「他們不知道我的情況怎樣，因為當時去堂阿哥那裡住，」她說。但她父親既是行會、立法局議員，我想又豈會完全不知道寮屋區的情況！那只是對她的愛與包容。
這點，方敏生也很明白。「好欣賞他給我很大空間去闖，給我很大的信心！我做什麼，他也覺得我是最好！」已為人母，育有一子一女，方敏生說換轉是自己，則是難以放開， 「現在女兒夜一點回家都打電話問，很不同的，可能因為現在社會複雜一點。」
說到貧窮仍有火
方敏生八十年初大學畢業，投入社會工作，可是三十年來，眼見貧窮差距、當時社會矛盾的房屋問題，如今仍然如夢魘一樣。
八十年代，政府興建不夠公屋，基層市民都住在安置區，環境惡劣， 「政府初時起的有如豬棚一樣，只給一個蓋，按你幾多人，就劃塊地給你，四面牆也是自己建的。」三十年過去了，安置區也全部拆卸、連當時服務的街坊都「上樓」了，她說不能說社會沒有進步，然而貧窮問題以至貧窮差距仍然活生生的存在，唯一不同只是形式轉變了！
她形容，目前基層家庭面對的是機會問題、部分是因跌了在「政策罅」中接受不到幫忙的問題，這些是今天富裕社會面對的貧窮問題。
「即是香港中環半條街是Armani、Gucci，仍然還有籠屋！」日前社聯才帶「大孖沙」體驗基層生活、造訪籠屋，「有個阿伯在廁所上面間了一個閣樓住，那次（自由黨）田北辰踩了進屎坑，因為不知道那個是屎坑！」貧窮個案多不勝數，方敏生連續列舉好幾個個案。「新來港的、他們叫『煲仔飯』，這些新來港的單親家庭就是靠個仔才可取綜援、養埋他！他們不敢看醫生，因為他不是香港人，這些貧
窮仍然存在！」
她又提起，失聰人士希望獲關愛基金撥款，給他們買助聽器， 「如果不是綜援、60 歲以上、85 分貝以上、學生，你是沒有的！」「有些情況則是老豆『走了佬』、阿媽持雙程證，個細路是交給廟祝照顧！因為沒辦法呀，要持雙程證，不是經常在這兒！就是有這些個案，令你聽到是不安樂的！」本港作為國際都會，有批細路不懂分辨時代廣場及立法會， 「你帶他去立法會，他問是否時代廣場，有朋友指是學習遲緩，其實是學習機會的問題！為何窮的小朋友的學習能力、語言能力、自信、社交能力都弱一點，他們不是生出來就是這樣的！」希望幫助該批貧童， 「如何不要輸在起跑線上。」政府在政策，最多多做一點， 「十大基建講緊二零三幾年啦！為何福利不可長期規劃、人口老化不可規劃、為何不可承諾？公屋為何不是三年就有得上，殘疾人士十年都無得上！護養、安老，人口為何沒有得規劃，為何社會發展比經濟發展次一等！要講還有排講！」說起貧窮問題，她還是有火！一切彷彿時光倒流，回到了當年在李鄭屋幫助屋民的那個方敏生！
「我從事社工這個行業有個福分，是看到人性的強處、生命影響生命的動力，你在其他行業並沒有這樣直接的，有些事物是Larger than Life（很傳奇的）。所以，如果俾我再選擇，我都會行返這條路！」
採訪：何素文、江麗芬
撰文：何素文
版面設定：楊慶祥
攝影：黃俊耀
何素文
2010年11月20日星期六
http://go47.blogspot.com/2010/11/blog-post_20.html
方敏生
最尾兩段。
得閒，我會講「正義．幸福．起跑線」。
************
信報財經新聞 2010-11-20 P13 | 政在生活 | 政在生活 | By 何素文
走入凡間 方敏生
外表纖纖弱質的社聯行政總裁方敏生，想必有點反叛的基因。當年中學時代，讀的是「師姑庵」的修女學校，卻自我作主選擇了在中六的時候轉往英皇書院，變成男校女生！大學時期，沒有往外國升學去，而是選擇在香港讀書，還堅持要入住以「玩」聞名的聖約翰宿舍。家境富裕，卻選擇到俗稱雞寮的寮屋區去當個發動居民動起來的社工。這一切一切，方敏生不說，真是看不出來！
方敏生剛剛獲政府委任成為二十位關愛基金成員之一。社會近日掀起了一股「仇富潮」，隨即鼓動對弱勢要有「關愛精神」。
「關愛」的意思比以前複雜、混雜了，有人出發點較單純，發生在非洲安哥拉正在去除地雷的小徑，走在上面的是英國戴安娜王妃，冒險是喚起世界關注掃雷。
遠一點的例子，就有一代偶像柯德莉夏萍，離開聲色犬馬的荷里活後，逕自跑到第三世界國家，呼籲發達國家關愛貧童。
放下身段對不少人來說是艱難，但對於一些人卻很容易！
方敏生便是一個例子。她家世顯赫，祖父是「抗日名將」方振武，父親方心讓除了是骨科名醫外，也是立法局及行政局的非官守議員。至於前政務司司長陳方安生，就是方敏生的堂姐。像所有名門大家庭之後一樣，方敏生自少都獲得很好的生活與教育安排，小時候一直讀「修女學校」，是那種同學們都有工人送午飯到學校來的那種「富貴人家」的學校，當年，她還會做一點浪漫的事來，就是不坐私家車偏要坐坐巴士，來體驗生活。「我們突登試下搭、了解什麼是隧道巴士！」。她的生活，一如其大學教授所言是「很好彩」，而她也承認自己一直以來的生活就像活在「龜殼」，處處受到保護。
不過，她可不甘於活在舒適的「龜殼」內。「龜殼」可以是保護，也可以視為一個窒礙， 「如果不伸出手腳出殼外，如何走前一步？走的一步可能好刺腳，但走前一步，可以找自己的海洋、自己的天空！」於是，中六那一年，方敏生為自己人生作出了一個重要抉擇，由「修女學校」轉到「平民學校」英皇書院，近距離體驗社會。到升讀大學，她也選擇入香港大學修讀社工，拒絕美國或英國大學的取錄，留在香港，希望多點了解社會。實習都是到漁灣居民組織、婦女戒毒工作、在觀塘雞寮的職業學校當駐校社工。而畢業後的第一份工作也是在李鄭屋的基層組織「基愛」，幫助寮屋居民。
一步又一步的打開人生一扇又一扇窗，讓她領悟到「在我的生活圈子是很理所當然的事，原來在同一社會入面，很多人不是！」她看到了較貧困的同學，寧願留在學校、有冷氣的機場讀書。她也看到了一些人的生命是沒有「希望」這兩個字！
「看到自己的細佬妹考慮的只是到英國或美國讀書，但雞寮的細路是沒有機會的，當時放學的那些細路，還被駐校社工『的』回學校，因為門口有黑社會在等梗放學！」她當時很動氣，還問那些學生： 「好的就俾人拉入冊，不好的就被人斬開一碌碌，你第日想點！」「你會看到什麼地方出身，就是什麼機會！沒有人可以選擇自己在哪裏開始，正如我沒有得選擇在哪個環境出身，他們也是沒有！」方敏生皺起眉頭，哀慟地說。
從低層中她明白到，世界其實很大！
跟方敏生談談，明白到她最大的本錢，並非家底、學識，而是她父母，尤其是爸爸的身教及對她的包容。
方心讓既是名醫，更是復康會創立人，他把復康工作看得重過事業，而小時候的方敏生自小跟父親出席活動、接觸殘障人士，令她有點領略， 「他教我活著不是為自己！」大學畢業後，大抵是反叛性格，當時方敏生有「三不」， 「政府不做！大機構不做！復康也不做，因為爸爸做復康！」最後落戶了在李鄭屋的基層組織「基愛」，主要服務白田安置區，劃下了社工生涯的起步點。比起上述的三個選擇，安置區單是看衛生環境，聽上來也最難忍受的。「公用的廁所如果是旱廁，就更加核突啦，我們返工去廁所，廁所門又爛晒，有些是條坑的，不是一個一個的廁所。」環境差，人背景複雜。那裏有邊緣社群、「癮君子」躲起來吸毒、罪案又特別多，偷竊、婦女洗澡遭人偷窺等事都會發生。那時做居民組織的方敏生還要等到晚上、街坊下班才上班，她習以為常。
「那時很多門字入面有字的那些字，全部識晒！」她哈哈說！
不過，她感激父親從來都是對她信任，更沒有多過問。「他們不知道我的情況怎樣，因為當時去堂阿哥那裡住，」她說。但她父親既是行會、立法局議員，我想又豈會完全不知道寮屋區的情況！那只是對她的愛與包容。
這點，方敏生也很明白。「好欣賞他給我很大空間去闖，給我很大的信心！我做什麼，他也覺得我是最好！」已為人母，育有一子一女，方敏生說換轉是自己，則是難以放開， 「現在女兒夜一點回家都打電話問，很不同的，可能因為現在社會複雜一點。」
說到貧窮仍有火
方敏生八十年初大學畢業，投入社會工作，可是三十年來，眼見貧窮差距、當時社會矛盾的房屋問題，如今仍然如夢魘一樣。
八十年代，政府興建不夠公屋，基層市民都住在安置區，環境惡劣， 「政府初時起的有如豬棚一樣，只給一個蓋，按你幾多人，就劃塊地給你，四面牆也是自己建的。」三十年過去了，安置區也全部拆卸、連當時服務的街坊都「上樓」了，她說不能說社會沒有進步，然而貧窮問題以至貧窮差距仍然活生生的存在，唯一不同只是形式轉變了！
她形容，目前基層家庭面對的是機會問題、部分是因跌了在「政策罅」中接受不到幫忙的問題，這些是今天富裕社會面對的貧窮問題。
「即是香港中環半條街是Armani、Gucci，仍然還有籠屋！」日前社聯才帶「大孖沙」體驗基層生活、造訪籠屋，「有個阿伯在廁所上面間了一個閣樓住，那次（自由黨）田北辰踩了進屎坑，因為不知道那個是屎坑！」貧窮個案多不勝數，方敏生連續列舉好幾個個案。「新來港的、他們叫『煲仔飯』，這些新來港的單親家庭就是靠個仔才可取綜援、養埋他！他們不敢看醫生，因為他不是香港人，這些貧
窮仍然存在！」
她又提起，失聰人士希望獲關愛基金撥款，給他們買助聽器， 「如果不是綜援、60 歲以上、85 分貝以上、學生，你是沒有的！」「有些情況則是老豆『走了佬』、阿媽持雙程證，個細路是交給廟祝照顧！因為沒辦法呀，要持雙程證，不是經常在這兒！就是有這些個案，令你聽到是不安樂的！」本港作為國際都會，有批細路不懂分辨時代廣場及立法會， 「你帶他去立法會，他問是否時代廣場，有朋友指是學習遲緩，其實是學習機會的問題！為何窮的小朋友的學習能力、語言能力、自信、社交能力都弱一點，他們不是生出來就是這樣的！」希望幫助該批貧童， 「如何不要輸在起跑線上。」政府在政策，最多多做一點， 「十大基建講緊二零三幾年啦！為何福利不可長期規劃、人口老化不可規劃、為何不可承諾？公屋為何不是三年就有得上，殘疾人士十年都無得上！護養、安老，人口為何沒有得規劃，為何社會發展比經濟發展次一等！要講還有排講！」說起貧窮問題，她還是有火！一切彷彿時光倒流，回到了當年在李鄭屋幫助屋民的那個方敏生！
「我從事社工這個行業有個福分，是看到人性的強處、生命影響生命的動力，你在其他行業並沒有這樣直接的，有些事物是Larger than Life（很傳奇的）。所以，如果俾我再選擇，我都會行返這條路！」
採訪：何素文、江麗芬
撰文：何素文
版面設定：楊慶祥
攝影：黃俊耀
何素文
Cafe Gray Deluxe
老老實實，我老了，約會時環境舒服一點，對我的心情很有幫助。我喜歡 Cafe Gray Deluxe Art Deco 的風格。令我想起 “blackmail“ 中男女主角約會的餐廳。
又，本來明天和蕭律師外遊，但他突然有單大 deal。去不成，no big deal。我拿拿臨約做臉做按摩。星期日一於返公司，dup 埋個死人 sharepoint。微軟真係黐孖筋，pop-up 的頁面連 ctrl + C 都唔得。點解咁 dumb 架！
I see dumb XX... they are everywhere.
星期四, 11月 18, 2010
星期三, 11月 17, 2010
if you feel like that everyone is busy but not me then you might want to speak it with my manager
我天不怕地不怕，咩人都唔怕。我唔介意做阿四打雜，但不幸我有點脾氣，最討厭人當我只係阿四打雜。兩項因素湊在一起，我寫email時會毫不留情用很強硬的措詞。
I would rather sound immature than be a nice-girl-oh-anyone-can-come-and-take.
I would rather sound immature than be a nice-girl-oh-anyone-can-come-and-take.
星期一, 11月 15, 2010
The Difference Between Facilities Management and Advanced Workplace Management
The Difference Between Facilities Management and Advanced Workplace Management
by Andrew Mawson who is the managing director of Workplace strategy workplace strategy consultants AWA.
Facilities Management as defined by Wikipedia is "the management
of buildings, physical plant and services. The services are sometimes considered to be divided into 'hard services' and 'soft services.' Hard services includes such things as ensuring that a building's air conditioning is operating efficiently, reliably, safely and legally. Soft services includes such things as ensuring that the building is cleaned properly and regularly or monitoring the performance of contractors (e.g. builders, electricians). The term 'facility management' is similar to 'property management' but often applied only to larger and/or commercial properties where the management and operation is more complex. Some or all of these aspects can be maintained by data-rich computer programs".
Advanced Workplace Management embraces much of the definition of Facilities Management, but is much more 'user' focused. Facilities Management tends to be more about the building and its infrastructure while Advanced Workplace Management is about focussing on improving professional and team performance by providing workplaces that help people and the organisation perform better. It is about making sure that the workplace is designed and managed on an ongoing basis with a single focus: to enable people and teams in doing their best work.
It embraces the idea that the workplace is the amalgam of the physical (space, desks, layout, ambience), the logical (IT hardware and software, printers, booking systems, telephony), the service (reception, concierge, cleaning, catering etc.) practices (the time, place, way, processes adopted for work) adopted by staff. It also recognises that the workplace may only in part be 'the office'. Other places for work such as the home, the road (mobile) or in other locations around the world.
Advanced Workplace Management differs from Facilities Management in that it is focused on the operational AND the strategic aspects ie. Making sure that the workplace is evolved to meet the needs of the volatile business world our clients live in. It therefore provides the underlying strategy for an organisation striving to create an 'Advanced Working' environment.
What Advanced Working can do for an organisation:
- Increase the number of people who can work from a typical office building by 20-30% by sharing workspace in the office with colleagues instead of 'owning it (most workplaces are only occupied 45% of the time they are available and they are only available some 60 hours out of a possible 168 that they are being paid for).
- Enable better cross functional team working and relationships by letting people from different teams work in the same physical areas when they need to. People who have adopted Advanced Working tell us that us that they get to know more colleagues.
- Enable easy, rapid and cost free re-organisation of teams and individuals. It costs approximately £400 to move an individual from one place to another in a building, requires 'swing space' and users have to wait takes too long for it to happen.
- Make for happier staff where commuting can be reduced for those with jobs and circumstances that don't need to work in the office every day. 50% of staff in our studies say that given the chance, they would like to work 1-2 days week at home.
- Helps people be at their most productive best every day by providing the right combination of spaces 'tuned' to their needs. People who have adopted Advanced Working tell us that they are more productive because they have the right places for the tasks they perform, they are more disciplined and plan better.
Retrieved from "http://www.articlesbase.com/management-articles/the-difference-between-facilities-management-and-advanced-workplace-management-1214892.html"
(ArticlesBase SC #1214892)
Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/management-articles/the-difference-between-facilities-management-and-advanced-workplace-management-1214892.html#ixzz15Ltm3TFn
Under Creative Commons License: Attribution
by Andrew Mawson who is the managing director of Workplace strategy workplace strategy consultants AWA.
People often ask "what's the difference between workplace management and Facilities Management". There are substantial differences.
Facilities Management as defined by Wikipedia is "the management
of buildings, physical plant and services. The services are sometimes considered to be divided into 'hard services' and 'soft services.' Hard services includes such things as ensuring that a building's air conditioning is operating efficiently, reliably, safely and legally. Soft services includes such things as ensuring that the building is cleaned properly and regularly or monitoring the performance of contractors (e.g. builders, electricians). The term 'facility management' is similar to 'property management' but often applied only to larger and/or commercial properties where the management and operation is more complex. Some or all of these aspects can be maintained by data-rich computer programs".
Advanced Workplace Management embraces much of the definition of Facilities Management, but is much more 'user' focused. Facilities Management tends to be more about the building and its infrastructure while Advanced Workplace Management is about focussing on improving professional and team performance by providing workplaces that help people and the organisation perform better. It is about making sure that the workplace is designed and managed on an ongoing basis with a single focus: to enable people and teams in doing their best work.
It embraces the idea that the workplace is the amalgam of the physical (space, desks, layout, ambience), the logical (IT hardware and software, printers, booking systems, telephony), the service (reception, concierge, cleaning, catering etc.) practices (the time, place, way, processes adopted for work) adopted by staff. It also recognises that the workplace may only in part be 'the office'. Other places for work such as the home, the road (mobile) or in other locations around the world.
Advanced Workplace Management differs from Facilities Management in that it is focused on the operational AND the strategic aspects ie. Making sure that the workplace is evolved to meet the needs of the volatile business world our clients live in. It therefore provides the underlying strategy for an organisation striving to create an 'Advanced Working' environment.
What Advanced Working can do for an organisation:
- Increase the number of people who can work from a typical office building by 20-30% by sharing workspace in the office with colleagues instead of 'owning it (most workplaces are only occupied 45% of the time they are available and they are only available some 60 hours out of a possible 168 that they are being paid for).
- Enable better cross functional team working and relationships by letting people from different teams work in the same physical areas when they need to. People who have adopted Advanced Working tell us that us that they get to know more colleagues.
- Enable easy, rapid and cost free re-organisation of teams and individuals. It costs approximately £400 to move an individual from one place to another in a building, requires 'swing space' and users have to wait takes too long for it to happen.
- Make for happier staff where commuting can be reduced for those with jobs and circumstances that don't need to work in the office every day. 50% of staff in our studies say that given the chance, they would like to work 1-2 days week at home.
- Helps people be at their most productive best every day by providing the right combination of spaces 'tuned' to their needs. People who have adopted Advanced Working tell us that they are more productive because they have the right places for the tasks they perform, they are more disciplined and plan better.
Retrieved from "http://www.articlesbase.com/management-articles/the-difference-between-facilities-management-and-advanced-workplace-management-1214892.html"
(ArticlesBase SC #1214892)
Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/management-articles/the-difference-between-facilities-management-and-advanced-workplace-management-1214892.html#ixzz15Ltm3TFn
Under Creative Commons License: Attribution
星期日, 11月 14, 2010
Personal Assistant
我覺得我自己是真的適合做 personal assistant 的，只是我未遇到我崇拜到甘願為他折腰，他又欣賞我到頂得順我的怪行的老闆。
佢既事即係你既事--這是 PA 的最高境界。
倒轉來說，你老板要令你想學佢做既野，明白佢既思考方法。
題外話，不知道大家可會覺得我冇骨氣？話說那時的老板鬧完我，我一臉不滿。時近過年，他放工掟了一封利是在我桌上，「新年快樂！」。
兩千元。
第二天，我照常上班。
佢既事即係你既事--這是 PA 的最高境界。
倒轉來說，你老板要令你想學佢做既野，明白佢既思考方法。
題外話，不知道大家可會覺得我冇骨氣？話說那時的老板鬧完我，我一臉不滿。時近過年，他放工掟了一封利是在我桌上，「新年快樂！」。
兩千元。
第二天，我照常上班。
星期六, 11月 13, 2010
Delegation
約了蕭公子打波，但...嘿，book唔到場。
於是往 The Landmark 上的一間日本菜晚飯。埋單該是天文數字罷。
席間蕭公子說起九單 deal 一起來，他晚晚兩三時才離開office。「咁你要 delegate 同事。」我 feedback meeting facilitator 上身，「來告訴我這是怎麼一回事。」蕭公子：「delegate 唔得㗎，我教佢要十個鐘，自己一個小時攪點。而且單單刁唔同。」我笑說：「但 delegation will make yourself easier。不如我地先 review 一下你的task list？！」
我們便回到 HKU，找個地方開了電腦，我引導蕭公子：「如果你要把你的工作分類，你點分？」一番咦咦娥娥，我們把工作分了五大類。再 drill down，例如：「蝦 bank financing 會有D咩documents 要做呀？」
Tasklist 做好了，我給蕭公子看。他驚見他的工作如此多瓣數，再醒覺他手下的同事現在在做的只是如此多瓣數的其中一小部份。
「咁點算？」
睇下點讓做 knowledge transfer, empower 手下的同事，並standardize process and develop some template, 再 keep 個 reference library, 讓他們有能力可以越做越多瓣數。
People management is about getting job done by others.
於是往 The Landmark 上的一間日本菜晚飯。埋單該是天文數字罷。
席間蕭公子說起九單 deal 一起來，他晚晚兩三時才離開office。「咁你要 delegate 同事。」我 feedback meeting facilitator 上身，「來告訴我這是怎麼一回事。」蕭公子：「delegate 唔得㗎，我教佢要十個鐘，自己一個小時攪點。而且單單刁唔同。」我笑說：「但 delegation will make yourself easier。不如我地先 review 一下你的task list？！」
我們便回到 HKU，找個地方開了電腦，我引導蕭公子：「如果你要把你的工作分類，你點分？」一番咦咦娥娥，我們把工作分了五大類。再 drill down，例如：「蝦 bank financing 會有D咩documents 要做呀？」
Tasklist 做好了，我給蕭公子看。他驚見他的工作如此多瓣數，再醒覺他手下的同事現在在做的只是如此多瓣數的其中一小部份。
「咁點算？」
睇下點讓做 knowledge transfer, empower 手下的同事，並standardize process and develop some template, 再 keep 個 reference library, 讓他們有能力可以越做越多瓣數。
People management is about getting job done by others.
星期四, 11月 11, 2010
Poisson distribution
不知道是否人之常情，我很低落時有想過去算命看相。但最終我沒有去算命看相。因為我壓根兒反對命定理論，我相信愚公移山，多於希臘神話--雖然我同時為希臘神話著迷。
如果我為自己算命，我會話我條命是 poisson distribution，一定不是 normal distribution。事情往往一抽(they come in batches) 咁發生。當然性格做就命運，愛好沉溺的我遇上某一單一事件便突然一發不可收拾。
其實我在統計課聽的書都還給了老師，但不知道為什麼我一直記得 poisson distribution。
如果我為自己算命，我會話我條命是 poisson distribution，一定不是 normal distribution。事情往往一抽(they come in batches) 咁發生。當然性格做就命運，愛好沉溺的我遇上某一單一事件便突然一發不可收拾。
其實我在統計課聽的書都還給了老師，但不知道為什麼我一直記得 poisson distribution。
（無題）
我的真絲床單，是他買給我的。我現在蓋的被，也是他買的。
我睡在他買的床單上蓋著他買的被，忽然有一種清醒。
是我不好。我意志不夠堅定。
為什麼事業上物質上我這麼清楚自己要什麼，枝葉可以完全置於度外，但感情上我不可以？
上班我只是要錢，我不要權不要名我只是要錢。物質比如買樓，我小學時已經想擁有自己的房子，我不是人有我有我才想要，我是真的想要，一直想要。
感情上我卻未能免俗。我介意他如何演譯，我下意識把他和其他人比較，把自己和其他人比較。人地男朋友點點點人地已經點點點你以前點點點......但人地點，從來都唔太關我事。
Rapport 原來很難有，遇上的時候要很珍惜，我三十歲人只遇上過三個有 rapport 的男人。但我已經轉過五份工，住過五間屋。
是我不好。我不懂得珍惜，不夠堅定獨立。為什麼我會不夠堅定獨立呢。唉。
由於我相信每個人都是 unique，所以失去的時候，我更加______。對我來說，錢是一樣的，張張一百蚊都一樣，但人，是個個不同的。
所以是 rapport, 不是 connection，也更加不是 checklist。
Rapport 呀 rapport。點解我要 rapport？Checklist 簡單很多呀。
我睡在他買的床單上蓋著他買的被，忽然有一種清醒。
是我不好。我意志不夠堅定。
為什麼事業上物質上我這麼清楚自己要什麼，枝葉可以完全置於度外，但感情上我不可以？
上班我只是要錢，我不要權不要名我只是要錢。物質比如買樓，我小學時已經想擁有自己的房子，我不是人有我有我才想要，我是真的想要，一直想要。
感情上我卻未能免俗。我介意他如何演譯，我下意識把他和其他人比較，把自己和其他人比較。人地男朋友點點點人地已經點點點你以前點點點......但人地點，從來都唔太關我事。
Rapport 原來很難有，遇上的時候要很珍惜，我三十歲人只遇上過三個有 rapport 的男人。但我已經轉過五份工，住過五間屋。
是我不好。我不懂得珍惜，不夠堅定獨立。為什麼我會不夠堅定獨立呢。唉。
由於我相信每個人都是 unique，所以失去的時候，我更加______。對我來說，錢是一樣的，張張一百蚊都一樣，但人，是個個不同的。
所以是 rapport, 不是 connection，也更加不是 checklist。
Rapport 呀 rapport。點解我要 rapport？Checklist 簡單很多呀。
反智頭條
一單新聞，大家各有角度，很有趣。
這新聞吸引我的不是細節，而是「就用未來一年時間玩玩自己，也和他們玩玩，看看大地產商在香港的壟斷有多麼長闊高深。」的想法。
對現實不滿，不要瞎嚷空鬧，行動。用你的方法，抗衡。
如果你覺得香港有錢人大哂，別只茶餘飯後叫叫嚷嚷，然後等運到。大家反思自己的生活，由自己的生活開始抗衡。
如果你覺得政府的房屋政策沒有照顧你的需要，找能為你發聲的代議士，立法會選舉你去投票。同時爭取普選特首。
我們有很多聲音，也可以身體力行把意見化為行動。如果我們的行動能夠互相感召，大家單一的行動便可能成就一場社會運動。
買廁紙是個 soundbite，性及排泄，從來都是令人印象深刻的話題。關於冇廁紙，嘿！
我是很小資產階級的，我對無孔不入的大資本家沒有厭惡，我只是想我如何在這資本主義的遊戲中，過我想過的生活。但有人很討厭大資本家或者突然發現大資本家很討厭，我支持他用自己的方法與之抗衡。而且我喜歡多元化的社會，既有我這種小資，又有比較社會主義的人。
「就用未來一年時間玩玩自己，也和他們玩玩」－這「玩」字很重要。未需要認真時，但願我們都可以遊戲人間一下。
又再說，自己唔玩，有時睇下人玩都okay。
這新聞吸引我的不是細節，而是「就用未來一年時間玩玩自己，也和他們玩玩，看看大地產商在香港的壟斷有多麼長闊高深。」的想法。
對現實不滿，不要瞎嚷空鬧，行動。用你的方法，抗衡。
如果你覺得香港有錢人大哂，別只茶餘飯後叫叫嚷嚷，然後等運到。大家反思自己的生活，由自己的生活開始抗衡。
如果你覺得政府的房屋政策沒有照顧你的需要，找能為你發聲的代議士，立法會選舉你去投票。同時爭取普選特首。
我們有很多聲音，也可以身體力行把意見化為行動。如果我們的行動能夠互相感召，大家單一的行動便可能成就一場社會運動。
買廁紙是個 soundbite，性及排泄，從來都是令人印象深刻的話題。關於冇廁紙，嘿！
我是很小資產階級的，我對無孔不入的大資本家沒有厭惡，我只是想我如何在這資本主義的遊戲中，過我想過的生活。但有人很討厭大資本家或者突然發現大資本家很討厭，我支持他用自己的方法與之抗衡。而且我喜歡多元化的社會，既有我這種小資，又有比較社會主義的人。
「就用未來一年時間玩玩自己，也和他們玩玩」－這「玩」字很重要。未需要認真時，但願我們都可以遊戲人間一下。
又再說，自己唔玩，有時睇下人玩都okay。
星期三, 11月 10, 2010
星期二, 11月 09, 2010
Stage Manager
剛剛跟梁小姐打了一個電話，她好忙，在排戲：「呀哥你幫手搵d黑色夾出來好冇呀」。好狠惡呀。
我問梁小姐今次咩 role，「SM」。
哦。唔怪之得。
所有 stage managers，都惡架。
我問梁小姐今次咩 role，「SM」。
哦。唔怪之得。
所有 stage managers，都惡架。
星期一, 11月 08, 2010
星期五, 11月 05, 2010
Foreign body
如果我戴隱形眼鏡，我一定日日疑神疑鬼那玻璃會轉到眼球的另一個圓，結果要入醫院請醫生把它拿出來。
我不戴隱形眼鏡，但我每月使用的女性用品，異曲同嚇。今天，惡夢成真。
黃昏在洗手間，懞醒醒，到我回過神來我才驚醒要抽出導管，但太遲了，已經去得太深。
我一臉擔心地離開公司，在利園Dior門前跟日本女朋友們說我晚飯後要去養和看醫生。她們了解事情後，一個拍拍我的肩說沒事沒事你大笑數下便跌出來了；另一個自告奮勇要出手幫我。嘻嘻哈哈我便放輕鬆了點，大家一起吃上海菜去。
十點多我來到養和，醫生一番努力後，我痛得哭了，仍然一無所獲。我要求圖解，醫生劃了圖，向我循循善誘。啊，我的身體原來是這樣的。「你明天上婦科罷，他們有些儀器可以幫到你；再說你真的痛的話，他們可以麻醉，但你便要入院。」聽罷我苦笑。
我不戴隱形眼鏡，但我每月使用的女性用品，異曲同嚇。今天，惡夢成真。
黃昏在洗手間，懞醒醒，到我回過神來我才驚醒要抽出導管，但太遲了，已經去得太深。
我一臉擔心地離開公司，在利園Dior門前跟日本女朋友們說我晚飯後要去養和看醫生。她們了解事情後，一個拍拍我的肩說沒事沒事你大笑數下便跌出來了；另一個自告奮勇要出手幫我。嘻嘻哈哈我便放輕鬆了點，大家一起吃上海菜去。
十點多我來到養和，醫生一番努力後，我痛得哭了，仍然一無所獲。我要求圖解，醫生劃了圖，向我循循善誘。啊，我的身體原來是這樣的。「你明天上婦科罷，他們有些儀器可以幫到你；再說你真的痛的話，他們可以麻醉，但你便要入院。」聽罷我苦笑。
星期二, 11月 02, 2010
Breastfeeding in public
從紐約客 A Cup of Jo 處讀到這一篇，會心微笑。
不知道是羞怯還是尷尬還是對婦孺欠缺同理心還是鹹濕，香港男士對女性於公眾地方哺乳很不自在。「她要開始了...」男士對我使個眼色，我報以poker face。辦公室設有nursing room，開會時男同事問：「用黎做咩架？」「俾d 餵母乳的媽媽用的。」男同事笑嘻嘻：「係咪帶埋個 bb入黎？」我拍案而起：「番去請教你媽咪啦。」
不知道是羞怯還是尷尬還是對婦孺欠缺同理心還是鹹濕，香港男士對女性於公眾地方哺乳很不自在。「她要開始了...」男士對我使個眼色，我報以poker face。辦公室設有nursing room，開會時男同事問：「用黎做咩架？」「俾d 餵母乳的媽媽用的。」男同事笑嘻嘻：「係咪帶埋個 bb入黎？」我拍案而起：「番去請教你媽咪啦。」
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